Games of This Year!
Oh wow, it's been a new year, time for another round of Single Sentence Game Reviews!
Red Dead Redemption:
3 Endings followed by title card makes this western a classic, fucking cougars.
Starcraft 2:
Played games for 15 years, this game is the only one that made my wrist hurt.
Limbo:
Reason I busted out the 360 after a whole year of leaving it in the closet. Also, brain slugs.
Heavy Rain:
JASON! JASON! JASON??!
Assassin's Creed Brotherhood:
A Slew of epic moments from the multi-player. Made me realized I'm very good at mind fucking, and stabbing random people on the internet.
Civilization V:
One more turn… holy shit its 5 am!
Super Scribblenauts:
Microscopic vegetarian bloodsucking robotic fighter jet: this phrase clears a level.
Etrian Odyssey III:
Drawing your own map makes me want to play better games.
Kirby’s Epic Yarn:
Kirby is absolutely adorable!!! Got bored and stop playing at world 2.
Mario Galaxy 2:
Mario is not for me, wait, why the hell did I buy this again?
Bioshock 2:
Little girls and drills.
Alan Wake:
Atmospheric and enjoyable, I now carry an industrial flashlight everywhere.
Darksiders:
Obviously hates people who play it on the PC, worst key binding decisions possible.
Dead Rising 2:
I guess you don’t ride very well, CHUCK. I’m very disappointing in your performance tonight, CHUCK. I guess you hear that a lot from women, CHUCK.
God of War 3:
Finished on Titan mode, had around 300 deaths. Never played it again.
Enslaved:
Great story, setting, and characters, stuck at the boat section.
Castlevania:
God of War but with only 1 chain.
Tactics Ogre:
I love strategy, and this is a total time sink.
Metal Gear Peace Walker:
Kojima is God. Also M47 solves all your problems.
Monster Hunter Tri:
Paid beta for Monster Hunter 3rd.
Monster Hunter 3rd:
Is teaching my roommate Japanese, he now knows the word for “rock”.
Mass Effect 2:
I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my favorite game of the year!

